


Something Better

by Carmenlire



Series: Tumblr Prompts [19]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, Communication Failure, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Hurt Alec, Insecure Alec Lightwood, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 11:02:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15948032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carmenlire/pseuds/Carmenlire
Summary: Alec had reached out to apologize and reassure Magnus. Before he’d been given the chance, though, Magnus had coolly continued, “They said that my choice in spouse was a liability to the company’s reputation.”Alec had stilled, brain refusing to process the words. Magnus was blaming him for the sharp veer in his career. He was appalled, blindsided.Thus had began the argument.





	Something Better

**Author's Note:**

> Dialogue prompt by Anonymous: "Sorry I ruined your life. Maybe you shouldn't have married me."

“You don’t understand, Alexander--”

“Oh, I think I understand just fine.”

“Goddamnit! Will you just listen to me. I’m trying to tell you--”

“I know what you’re trying to tell me, Magnus.” Alec breaks off, breathing hard, trying to ignore the way his voice is cracking. “I’m sorry that you were turned down for that promotion because of me. Sorry I ruined your life. Maybe you shouldn't have married me."

Everything freezes and Magnus's face turns ashen. The only sound in the room is their labored breathing. Alec turns around, takes a few steps before raising his hands to his face, pressing trembling palms into his eyes hard enough to burn.

Fuck, he’s so tired. He’s been arguing with Magnus for the better part of the evening and everything’s been off between them for days. He’d known something was up with his husband but like a goddamn fool, he’d given Magnus his space. He knew Magnus better than anyone and usually all his husband needed was a little time before he told Alec whatever it was that was bothering him.

Alec had left mildly concerned and moved up to actively worried two days ago. Magnus didn’t smile when he sat across from Alec for breakfast. He didn’t seem to welcome his touch when they went to bed.

He was spending more time out of the loft than usual and pulled away from Alec when he got too close.

It was tearing up Alec from the inside out and everything had risen to a boiling point tonight. Alec had made dinner for them, partly to soothe Magnus but mostly to silently apologize for whatever it is that he seemed to have done.

He’d barely dished out the pasta before Magnus had returned to his new uncommunicative self. He’d avoided eye contact and responded with monosyllabic answers said in a dead voice.

Finally plain pissed off, Alec had asked, “What bug crawled up your ass?”

Without looking up from his plate, Magnus had said, “I didn’t get that promotion at the lab.”

Immediately contrite, Alec had reached out to apologize and reassure Magnus. Before he’d been given the chance, though, Magnus had coolly continued, “They said that my choice in spouse was a liability to the company’s reputation.”

Alec had stilled, brain refusing to process the words. Magnus was blaming him for the sharp veer in his career. He was appalled, blindsided.

Thus had began the argument.

It had quickly grown into a yelling match. Magnus was by turns frigid and volcanic while Alec maintained a defensive, snide veneer.

Alec feels fucking tears pool and presses harder against his traitorous eyes.

His marriage is imploding and he’s caught in the middle, being sliced to ribbons by every sneering word and biting retort.

The room is still silent and Alec focuses on his breathing. He can’t focus on anything, just wonders how the hell it came to this.

He’s startled when he feels Magnus come up behind him, wrapping arms around his middle and resting his forehead against Alec’s back.

Alec’s almost afraid to breathe lest Magnus back away, out of his reach and out of their home.

Magnus shifts, leaves bare kisses against the expanse of Alec’s shoulders, feather light and ephemeral. Fleeting like this respite.

“I love you, Alexander. Don’t you ever goddamn doubt that.”

Alec shudders but doesn’t say anything. He’s afraid to. He doesn’t know when Magnus became a landmine that he was terrified of setting off but here they are.

“You are the light of my life,” Magnus rasps. “There is not a single day that goes by that I don’t want to get down on my fucking knees and thank Christ that I get to have you. You are everything, darling.”

Alec pulls away, whirling around to confront Magnus. “Then what the fuck was that line of bullshit earlier about me holding you back? I know how important your career is to you, Magnus, and I know that if anything else got in its way you’d cut it out without hesitation or remorse. Why won’t you just fucking talk to me,” he pleads.

Magnus takes a deep breath, raising his hands in a surrendering gesture. “I phrased my explanation earlier poorly and I am so sorry about that. Please, just-- listen. Let me talk.”

Alec doesn’t say anything, just stares at Magnus, eyes dead. He is so fucking tired.

Galvanized, Magnus rushes to fill the dead air that’s strangling him as he starts to grasp just how wrong this entire thing’s gone.

“As you know, Ragnor left for a better position last month, leaving the director’s position open at Labyrinth Labs.” Magnus measures each word, desperate to make sure that he’s conveying exactly what he wants, that Alec will understand him. That he _wants_ to understand.

Magnus stares into Alec’s expressionless face and licks his lips, willing Alec to just listen for a minute. “Lorenzo Rey took over in the interim and he was tasked with choosing a successor. We’ve been rivals for years and I knew that it would stick in Rey’s craw to promote me.

“However, with my reputation and credentials, he’d be a fool not to, especially when his decision would come under a lot of speculation.” Magnus looks up, gazing intently into Alec’s eyes. He takes a step closer but quickly stills when he sees Alec stiffen.

“Unfortunately, Rey chose someone else from an outside company to commandeer the department. He said--” Magnus breaks off as he sees the shutters fall over Alec’s eyes.

Uncaring, he steps forward, reaches out and takes his lovely husband’s hands, holding on with an iron grip even though Alec makes no move to withdraw-- though he doesn’t return Magnus’s hold.

“He said that having the spouse of the heir to Lightwood Incorporated would raise suspicion since your parents filed bankruptcy in disgrace. I was fine as a lead scientist but having such a publicized leadership role in Labyrinth would put everyone under a microscope and he just couldn’t justify promoting me.”

Magnus sees Alec pulling away, emotionally just before physically and he invades Alec’s space until they're breathing the same air. One hand keeps Alec’s in his as the other goes to his face, cupping his cheek, turning his head until he’s staring into Alec’s goddamn soul. “But, darling, my beautiful Alexander-- that was the wrong move. I refused to accept that decision and went over his head. His superiors agreed that it was foolish decision and there’s been an internal investigation going on that will most likely end next week with an announcement of Lorenzo’s resignation under concerning circumstances and mounting evidence of questionable business activities. I’ll probably be promoted in the next few weeks.”

Alec’s silent for a long minute.

He opens his mouth, closing it without saying anything. Finally he gets out, “Then why-- why have you been in such a shit mood this week?”

Shaking his head, Magnus looks lost. “I don’t really have a reason. Lorenzo was pissing me off but I didn’t want to burden you-- I know that you’re on deadline for your book and--”

“Magnus, you have to know that nothing, not my book, not _anything_ is more important to me than you. You come first, always, no questions asked.”

Magnus looks discomfited. “I’m sorry, Alec. I just know how much the stuff with your parents bothers you and didn’t want to bring it all up--”

Filing away that information, Alec is helpless to keep the burning question from escaping. “You said I was holding you back--”

Alec stops talking as Magnus raises a finger to his lips. “I did not,” he gently chides. “I started the story by explaining what Lorenzo had said and then you shut down and things escalated and grew out of hand.”

They’re both quiet as they process the words. Playing through the evening, Alec can admit that Magnus has a point. This fight had been brewing all week and Alec had granted no quarter, hadn’t wanted to when he’d been hurt and pissed off and had finally found an outlet.

“I guess,” he starts, tongue darting out to wet his mouth. “I guess I could’ve listened a little before jumping all over you.”

Magnus smiles. “You could’ve. But, then, I’ve been in a funk all week and I’ll admit that I could've started my story with a few disclaimers and a better explanation. I did spring everything on you in a poor light.”

Both of his hands go to Alec’s face, squishing his cheeks just a little as he commands Alec’s complete attention. “I need you to know something, Alexander. I know emotions were running high and we were both frustrated and pissed off and hurt but _I love you_. There is not a single universe where I am not the luckiest man alive for having married you. I will never, ever regret that, my love. I don’t care if it was completely because of you that I didn’t get that promotion. I don’t care. If having you meant that I had to shovel shit for the rest of my life, I wouldn’t care. Not as long as I had you waiting for me at the end of it.”

Alec softens, knows that there’s vulnerability shining in his eyes. “I want you to have the world, Magnus. I couldn’t take it if I was standing in your way.”

“You never stand in my way, darling. You stand at my side and make me better, always.”

Alec falls forward, wrapping arms around Magnus’s waist and burying his face in his husband’s neck.

They both hold onto each other too tightly. After long minutes, they move to the bedroom, ignoring the mess in the kitchen, the tension still seeping through the living room.

They strip and climb into bed, They hold each other for hours, murmuring reassurance and talking quietly through the night.

Magnus gets his promotion and Alec stands by his side.

There are fights and arguments and disagreements. Neither ever questions the other’s devotion again. They both build their marriage to new and better heights, always finding security and strength in it and in each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Catch me on tumblr @carmenlire! I'm always accepting prompts :)


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